Taking a Beeting

(Author's note: other titles rejected for this post included Beetniks, Just Beet It, and The Beetitudes)


I recently signed up for a Community Supported Agriculture (CSA) box after reading Michael Pollan's The Omnivore's Dilemma (his most recent article is here). A CSA box provides you with a hearty helping of organic produce, supporting local independent farmers instead of agribusiness giants - click the CSA link above for a farm in your area (yes, even in Las Vegas).

Since they give you whatever is in season, it means you need to be creative. For example, in the past few weeks I've wound up with 6 beets. I wasn't even sure they were beets at first, having never seen an actual beet. My Russian ancestors would be so ashamed. Actually, apparently this is not true, since chard is also a beet (!) but I have not seen the body.

But it is a root vegetable, which means theoretically that you should be able to do anything to it that you do to a potato. As mentioned before, potatoes are to nutrition what the Real Housewives of New Jersey is to art - so you get the bonus of something with vitamins and, you know, flavor.

My first thought was to do yam fries, substituting beet for the yam. This being my first encounter with beets, I didn't know how to tell when they were cooked; my batch wasn't (areas of lighter pink are a good sign; when those areas start turning brown it's getting close to burnt).

Then a friend suggested beet chips - which is effectively the exact same thing, you just cut the beet differently. All the recipes I found suggested using a mandoline because it's hard to get the beet sliced thin enough; I used a peeler the first time and I think it was too thin and also ended up making my kitchen look like a set for CSI. You don't need to peel them if you clean the outside well enough, which is good, since beets are juicy and messy; prepare accordingly.

Ingredients:
1+ beet(s), sliced reasonably thin (about the same thickness as a potato chip)
Oil (canola or olive)
Optional: salt, paprika, grated parmesan, etc.

The first time around I tried deep frying. I just heated oil in a pan (enough to cover) and then put in the sliced beet(s). Stir occasionally, and when you notice the lighter areas getting brown and them looking more like chips, put them out on a paper towel to cool a bit. Add seasoning if desired, although they're pretty darn good plain.

You can also shave a few hundred calories from the recipe by putting a tablespoon (or more if you have 3+ beets) of oil in a bowl and toss the beet chips in there and then evenly distribute them on a cookie sheet and bake them at 400 degrees. The recipe I read said 45 minutes to an hour but I burned the first batch and undercooked the second so I recommend frequent checking. It also said to flip part way through but I'm not sure how necessary that is. Anyway, the 3rd picture is deep fried and the 4th is baked but I defy anyone to tell the difference - assuming they're cooked properly.

One final note: be prepared for the beet-ness to pervade your trips to the bathroom for the next 24-36 hours. No, you don't have an intestinal hemorrhage, that's just the beets. Hopefully.

Fun with Food Processors 1: Sun-Dried Tomato Tapenade

Tapenade is a French word for "delicious on bread." Typically its made with olives. This recipe adds sun dried tomatoes because it's cool like that.

Ingredients:
Olives
Olive oil
Garlic
Sun dried tomatoes
Lime juice (optional)
Paprika
Salt and pepper to taste

You can probably do this in a blender but I recommend a food processor instead. If you're not sure about the operation, just remember that ingredients go inside the food processor, and body parts stay outside.

I haven't put in measurements because I usually eyeball it. I go for a roughly 1:1 ratio of olives to sun dried tomatoes. I recommend draining the olives first so that the salt from the brine doesn't ruin it - something I've learned from experience.

You can pick your poison as far as the olives are concerned - I've used kalamata, Spanish, and black, but the olives should be a secondary taste to the tomatoes. And the garlic. Mmmm, garlic.

If your tomatoes came in a jar with oil in it, you can use some of that oil in the recipe. If they are dry (like mine were, above), you will need to either add some water or some olive oil to get the consistency right. I'm not sure about the lime juice, but I had some around last time I made it and figured it might fill out the flavor some. It'd be fine without, though, so if you're skittish, you can omit it.

Aside from being amazing on bread, you can also use it in wraps or with eggs. It's amazing with bread, though.

Sweet Potato/Yam Fries

Potatoes are one of the biggest crops in the world (along with corn and wheat), but they are a nutritional black hole. Yams aren't exactly a nutritional goldmine, but they're way better than non-sweet potatoes - and they actually, you know, have a flavor, instead of tasting like moist spackle.

Recipes abound for baked yam fries...which I should try ones of these days. I just used the way I learned to make fries and substituted yams for potatoes (N.B. - the oil adds calories, though, so calorie-conscious folks are better off baking).

It's really easy: peel the yam, saving the peels for stock if you like. Slice it into a pleasing, fry-like shape. You should get a lot of fries from a single yam - if not, you may be using a carrot by mistake.

Heat canola oil in a large saucepan. Add fries. Cook. I will sometimes reserve the excess oil in a jar to re-use later.

These are good with ketchup or mayo (unless Vincent Vega will be joining); if your local super market stocks it and you like spicy food, wasabi mustard works well, too.

Cowboy Soup

Soup really is good food, although I think it's way better when it's not out of a can. And given how easy it is to make, why would you use canned stuff? The ease with which it is made can be summarized by the following equation:

ingredients + water + heat + time = soup

Note that I have water listed in the equation, although it's way better with stock, which is really easy to make. It's also very Earth conscious, since you make it with stuff you would normally throw away. Go green. Just not in your soup. Unless it's St. Patrick's Day.

This is basically a tomato vegetable soup. I used the stock I made in the last recipe and then made up some more with some yam peelings, some chard stems, and the remnants of a lime I had squeezed for the lime juice.

Ingredients (but really, do whatever):
2 tbsp olive oil
1 quarter white onion, diced*
1 cup diced scallions*
1 orange pepper, diced*
1 yellow pepper, diced*
5 cloves garlic, minced*
2 liters vegetable stock*
1 can unsalted diced tomatoes, with juice*
1 can kidney beans*
1 can black beans*
2 cups chopped Swiss chard*
1 tsp turmeric
2 tbsp paprika*
salt and black pepper to taste
grated parmesan
3 basil leaves, chopped

* Or more. Or less. Seriously, do whatever. Note that I did not put an asterisk by the turmeric...that stuff is pretty potent so it's one of the few spices where I err on the side of caution.

You could get by with throwing everything in a pot and waiting for the veggies to get soft and the soup to taste yummy. But I modified a recipe in How to Cook Everything, which, despite its title, has a woefully limited scope.

Heat the olive oil in the biggest sauce pan/crock pot/iron cauldron you have. Sauteé the onions and scallions until your kitchen smells yummy. Add the peppers and the garlic and lightly sauteé them. Remember Alton Brown's directives about garlic: the smaller you mince it, the stronger the flavor; and once you burn it, it's toast.

Add the stock. If you have frozen stock, melt it separately (or in the microwave). Add everything but the parmesan and basil. Bring to a boil, then reduce to low heat and cover, letting simmer for a few hours.

Garnish with parmesan and fresh basil. Makes 10 servings. Maybe more. Maybe less.

Taking stock

Vegetable soup is probably one of my favorite ways to actually eat vegetables, and it's great because you can pretty much put whatever you want in there and if the rest of it is okay, you'll be fine.

I've made it before with just water, and it's fine, but it's better with vegetable stock. Save up all the stuff you would normally toss - peelings, cores, stems, whatever - and then just stew it in hot water.

I feel weird even giving a recipe here, because it kind of defeats the point, but here's what I used:
- peels from two yams
- stems of 4 portobello mushrooms
- cores from 2 crookneck squash and 3 zucchini
- leaves from 3 leek stalks

You want enough water to cover at least, maybe more if you've got some really nutrient-rich stuff in there like kale or something. (N.B. - we'll cover recipes that leave you with yam peels, mushroom stems, squash cores, etc. later).

Bring to a boil; reduce to a low heat and let stew for a few hours, maybe longer. Everything should have become waterlogged, and the water should be a different color. Find a suitable container (I used another pot) and use a colander or strainer to filter the veggies from the water. Squeeze remaining water out of the veggies with a spoon before discarding them.

As you can see, I got an earthy brown vegetable stock. I decided to split it into two containers and refrigerate one and freeze the other. One would go to the vegetable soup, and the other to something completely different...